Trust (Trip to Gonder) August 13, 2015

         According to the dictionary.com app, trust can be a noun, adjective, verb (with or without object), verbal phrase or an idiom. It can refer to “a person or thing on which one relies” with “reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of that person or thing; confidence.” It is “to invest,” “to commit or consign,” “to rely or depend,” to expect confidently,” “to believe,” and “to hope.” It is something that isn’t often guaranteed, but rather earned time and time again. It’s not always easy or comes naturally. But sometimes, it’s the only thing one has to go on.

Though close to Tigray region, many people in Gondar don’t speak Tigrigna. I’d never been to the city before arriving on during a deluge one evening with my parents. After 8 hours on paved and dirt roads with a driver I’d never met before that morning. This was a time when trust was essential and very obvious.

I’d asked an Ethiopian friend if he knew any drivers that would be willing to take my parents and me to Gondar from Adwa in one day. He talked around and eventually found a friend who would take us for 5,000 birr ($243.90). After breakfast in Adwa my friend and the driver met us. My friend made sure we were good before waving good-bye to us. We stopped briefly in Axum for the driver to pick up a jar of honey for his friend and in Selekleka to pick up our large bags, before heading out to unknown. On the far side of Shire we filled up the tank before driving into new lands.

We drove on and on and on. Pass refugee camps. Zigzagging down hills.

Creeping back up. Occasionally the driver would stop for us to take a picture before we continued on. We munched on the American stash of oatmeal chocolate chip cookies, string cheese and Trader Joe’s crackers. Minutes and hours trickled by. We went over bridges, through mud hut villages, patiently navigated through construction zones, and lapsed into silence.

I didn’t know where we were. I didn’t know how the road wound to get to Gondar. My parents and I later talked about how the driver could really have taken us anywhere. We could have been kidnapped to Sudan, or had our bags held ransom until we agreed to pay him more. But trust, was getting in a car with someone we barely knew, a friend of a friend. Trust was relying on him to know the way.  Throughout the next day when bajaj (small three wheeled taxies) drivers took us on seemingly round about ways, we had to rely on them again. Trust.

Another part of being in a new city was not knowing where anything was located. Unlike the other cities I’d taken my parents to, Gondar was the first one where I had no idea where to go for anything. I didn’t know what hotel to stay at, how to get to the castles, where the good places to eat were, or what other historical things were there to see. On my own I was at a loss.

Trust can also be giving up independence and asking for help that you hope is valid.

We asked the driver to take us to a hotel that was nice, but not too expensive. He dropped us off at a fabulous place. We asked the hotel staff how to get to the castles. They pointed us in the right direction. From the castles we asked how to get to Fasilida Baths. The staff got us a bajaj, told us a reasonable price for the ride, and reminded us that our ticket to the castles counted for the bath too. We asked how to get to Gebre Brehane Selassie Church. The bajaj driver took us and pointed out the ticket office. Dad asked the “world wide web” (aka. Google) where to eat dinner. The electronic strangers’ responses lead us to a fabulous meal at Four Sisters. Asking takes trust.

Gondar wasn’t the only place where trust was needed. We trusted our friend to pick us up at the airport in Dar-es-Salaam, Tanzania. Even when he was late, we trusted that he still would come. We trusted the guides on safari to keep us all safe even when we got out of the car. We trusted that ATM cards would work and all transportation (buses, cars, airplanes) would be safe. Sometimes trust was broken (reservations went missing, directions were incorrect), but overall our trust wasn’t misplaced.

            My favorite definition of trust is a “confident expectation of something:  hope.” When I was packing for Africa my mom mentioned once that she hoped to come to Ethiopia and see me. She told me that she trusted that God would provide the funds. Slowly but surely the confident expectation of a trip with her and Dad traveling to me formed. They trusted that Dad’s new church would give him time off to come. They trusted that all bags could be under 50 pounds. They trusted that planes would connect and be on time. They trusted me to speak Tigrigna, barter, and know where we were going.

            Before the trip, I was battling trust about the future. What to do after Peace Corps is becoming a very prominent and relevant question that I’ve started asking myself often. The future is uncertain. Now? (Smile) Now I trust entirely, rely on, believe in, commit to and hope with all my heart on God to show me the way. Uncertainty is unnerving. It is to “doubt” -- being in a state of “unpredictability; indeterminacy; indefiniteness” with “hesitancy.”  Trust allows us to get passed that; to enjoy life beyond our own understandings. I ask questions confidently. To explore the new without fear--even if the new isn’t what we anticipated. Trust brings freedom.